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Saying “sure” on a regular basis is an indication that you’ve got misplaced your integrity. Right here’s a brand new 3-step technique
“I don’t have time to write down.”
Have you ever ever mentioned that? Do you usually squeeze writing into the evenings, weekends, and even holidays?
I did simply that, and burned out after I was a college lecturer. I struggled with the stress to publish, was exhausted from my 6h each day commute, and felt I used to be failing my younger youngsters. As an alternative of taking break day, I labored more durable — as a result of I believed “If solely I get all of it executed, I can calm down.” That led to panic assaults, burnout, and a complete breakdown. (Take heed to my burnout story on the Writer Revolution podcast).
Saying “sure” on a regular basis is an indication that you’ve got misplaced your integrity. You worth others greater than your individual wants, and also you’ve fallen right into a behavior of individuals pleasing and saying “sure”, as a substitute of defending your self.
I’m going to stroll via a way more useful method. And this method shall be centered on the best way to confidently say “no” along with your Future Self in thoughts.
Let’s dive into the three steps that show you how to just do that.
At all times ask for a number of days to think about a request (even when you’re requested ‘on the spot’ in an off-the-cuff chat’), e.g.
- I’ve to consider this and I’ll name you again this afternoon.
- I’ll verify my schedule and get again to you tomorrow.
- Give me 10 minutes and I’ll name you proper again.
Get into the behavior of “pausing”. Which will already be extraordinarily uncomfortable if you recognize another person is ready for a solution. Attempt it in any case.
Whilst you pause, undergo step 2.
Your Future Self is you a number of days, weeks, months down the road. No matter you resolve as we speak, you must cope with later.
When a request is available in, journal about these questions:
- If I say “sure” as we speak, will I help or harm my Future…
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